Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Home Again

I sit on my big comfy floral chair in the living room listening to the sounds of the familiar all around me
and I wonder if Minnesota was just a really really good dream.

Having gone for two whole weeks was the best and most nourishing decision I could have made.
Orion got to know my parents and my sister really well and his comfort level was high
but we both missed Schmilly so much and the feeling was mutual.

Seeing him at the airport waiting for us with his handsome face all lit up was Christmas.

I have that weird feeling that maybe you get too after a big travel where you feel like every decision is being pulled through molasses: getting in the car to grab a latte this morning took more brainpower than usual. I always wonder at this phenomenon!

I also wonder why on earth I live so far away from these magnificent kin...leaving and braving a four hour flight with an eighteen-month-old wonder felt more courageous than most things I've done in quite a while: gone are the days of NBA national-anthem singing and solo relocations to huge cities I don't know from Adam. Now I feel accomplished if I hold in my tears while holding my I celebrate the fine art of holding my shit together when my father says tenderly, "You're doing a wonderful job with Bubby" when we say goodbye.... So. Hard. To. Do.

My stage fright is now tied to the wee man holding my hand through the maze of travelers. By the way, he said 'hi' to nearly everyone and coaxed a lot of smiles and reciprocal greetings. I felt honored to be his chaperone.

Sometimes when he puts his 'hi' out there and it goes unmet I feel disappointed for him, but it's excellent preparation for the world at large. Not everyone is friendly and certainly not everyone is safe.
At one point he got up to stretch his legs and the very kind elderly woman who sat in front of us became the crush of the minute.

He stood and stared at her with a shy sweetness and she did the dearest thing: she patted his dimpled hands and cherished his attention. My heart was full and darn those onions all over the plane!!
Darn that sawdust in the air!

I'll be announcing the winner of the earring contest Friday morning
and I want to thank the beauties who entered so very much.

I also want to thank everyone who continues their daily voting for the American Made contest: I am pretty sure there are just a few more days left for the general category votes and though I am well-voted I am still so far behind the leaders.

Still, let's try, friends!!!


six times a day 

for the underdog who loves you.



Tasha Imajin said...

I know what you mean about the "hi" that goes unanswered. Ugh. My heart. When Azure was into waving at everyone, some kids ran past her without even noticing and that hurt me in a weird and surprising way. She didn't seem to mind, but even the memory now makes me sad. You ARE doing a wonderful job!

Tizi said...

Welcome home! Take your time....savor the connection you feel right were missed....


Wonderful descriptions of life with a little one...I could have written this 8 years ago....but didn' did Now!

And to those grumps that don't say hi back....I are missing out big time!

Ohhhhh onions and sawdust in the air here too:)
Can't wait to see what is going to just burst out of you....

only daydreaming said...

Orion is the sweetest. all the photos of him with those curls make me smile every day. and how achingly sweet of your father to validate your mothering skills. there's just something about being recognized by our fathers that is like no other.

I live fairly close to my immediate family, only 3 hours away. but still that distance seems to far sometimes. my husband & I lived in TX for 7 years and then in CA for 2 years and moved back to the midwest where our families live a few years ago. even though we made some great friends and saw as much beauty in CA as we could in 2 yrs, it was some of the loneliest, saddest years of my life being so far away from family, especially after my brother & his wife started having kids. now that I have nieces and nephews to love, I just can't stand the idea of moving far away again. adventure is great but family is so important to my well-being.

wish I could vote 50 times a day for you. I don't know who the leaders in your category are (can't seem to find how to search by most votes) but you are certainly deserving of this prize. I know you would do great things. but you will do great things anyway.

I haven't been commenting much lately on anyone's blogs, but know I'm thinking of you. peace & love Sunny.

Allisunny S. said...

Dana, Tizi, Tasha,

You all understand the love that is so big that bonds. It's always such a warming feeling when others 'get' exactly what I am writing about. Thank you for being here.