Last night we were watching the kinda adorable movie "How to Lose Friends and Alienate People" and there was a screenshot of Sunset Blvd. in Hollywood and I burst into tears....
burst into tears the same way I used to when my NYC besties would call and say, "I'm in that bakery in Queens" or, "I just got back from Central Park"...
I would lose it, because I missed my experiences in that fabulous place. Missed the adventures and the hungry young twenty-somethingness that you can never quite experience again after you graduate from Ramen Noodles and and peanut butter sandwhiches for all your meals.
I miss Los Angeles.... I miss the smells, the sights, the way the light hits your eyes in this really lovely way... but the kicker is this: if you told me I could move back tomorrow I wouldn't bite.
I would consider it, hesitate and then stay here voluntarily.
Because Northern California is healing something way down deep in my soul
Because I don't belong there anymore, and sometimes that is the most painful feeling: the missing combined with the knowledge that even if you could return you know you would be worse for wear in the end.
I am finding my feet here in Petaluma, becoming a part of the Yoga community slowly, surely and with huge love in my heart.
Shopkeepers know my face and greet me with big, lovely smiles of recognition...
Streets are becoming familiar.
I am on the right path, indeed. Today I decided to make a couple of classic designs for the leather shop, as my way of revisiting Los Angeles in terms of the creativity it gave me and the designs it inspired.
Update-aliciousness: Wow!!! Thanks for making homes for these heartfelt creations and with such speed!!
That makes me AND Los Angeles very happy :)
I love you, SoCal.... I really do.
I'll be there for a week at the end of October to play a bunch of Gigs in Redlands and one in LA proper.
I will drink in the sun, drink in my dearest friends and allow myself to experience its beauty with the happiness of a tourist and the heart of a lover.
3 comments:
I soo understand those feelings of missing a place yet being content & settled where you are...you can always visit!
I understand this too. I feel the same way about Raleigh (though it's not nearly so far away) because that is the city where I spread my wings, lived alone in a little 1910 bungalow downtown, and found myself. A part of me will forever be beneath the university bell tower, on the sidewalks of Cox Avenue, and dancing the nights away on Glenwood.
Though I would not trade my country home or current life for anything.
Beautiful post, and beautiful jewelry to commemorate the memories.
such poetry...& thanks for sending a bit of sunny cal...north or south...in leather & stone for ME...
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