Tuesday, March 24, 2009

My Man

My Schmilly. 
The miracle of my adult life.

Today we had a setback, a potential renter that didn't seem to work out... we thought everything was set in stone, but it wasn't. It was fluid and moving, an unsigned lease agreement. Now it's back to square one for our gorgeous, soon-to-be-empty condo.
My heart started its familiar flopping fish sensation after 2 PM and I could not seem to get it under control: still can't, but I am having tremendous patience with/love for my amazing ceaseless organ and all that it has beat through lately!
A big piece of the puzzle we thought was solved came undone and so did I today.

This evening my Husband and I sat at our little kitchen table, surrounded by boxes and beset with worries that we cannot even understand completely....
We talked frankly and tenderly from opposite sides of the table
Loved each other into real laughter
And I cried to know that I get to be with him until we are no longer earthly.
He is so magnificent and we are so in love, even with all of this stuff that hasn't felt normal at all.
Anthony has been my rock and my gentle guide through the most harrowing moments of change and my partner in happiness when good news has come.
Nothing has ever been more consistent than his love for me and mine for him.

We will find another renter. We will weather these storms of fear and real challenge with our heads on straight and our deepest respect in place.

It is the only thing I know right now.


Dave said...

He is a good and lucky man from everything you write.... yes this renter wasn't the answer, so it leads to another question that will be answered.

Relax, you are with a huge family of friends.


Ann from Montana said...

It sounds cliche, easier said than done and a bit simplistic to "count your blessings", but for myself, in the midst of the unexpected that threatens to throw me, that simple act can change my focus and perspective, remove a bit of fear and leave me the wits and energy to focus positively on the problem of the day.

I would repeat Dave's "Relax", remember to breath deeply, focus on the positive, one problem at a time. And obviously you have a wonderful partnership, ye olde troubles halved and blessings doubled - Carry on!

angie said...

*sigh* i long for a love like yours. minor earthly setbacks like renters mean so very little when set against all you have (from what i've read here). you still have the rest of your amazing life around you.

Anonymous said...

You guys are such a lovely, happy couple.

Good luck with the move. The renter problem WILL work out.

Burnetta said...


I love the way you express feelings; that is a beautiful gift for your music as well as your coping with life. I am wishing you and Tony good news soon and the exciting move and change in your lives. It is an exciting journey you are on and you are so wise. Hi to Tony.

Anonymous said...